Wife's weight problem (page 6)

Dustin

My best friend had the same problem. The girl was good looking, and in shape when they were going out. Just before the wedding we all noticed she was starting to balloon. Too bad for him, she gained 175 lbs. in about 6 months. I feel for you, and hopefully she will try and lose some weight. Have you told her how it makes you feel?

Dustin

I just wanted to comment that changing your diet together can really help out. If you both make an effort to eat better, it should help. Plus there are a lot of great weight loss supplements out there that are very safe and effective.

rocketman

Welcome to the board. Quite the first post, I must say. Are you sure you didn't mistake this discussion board for one on health and sexuality?

Mecurious?

It's all about trophies for guys. They care more about what other guys think of their women than anything. If they can't walk in the door with a hot little thing, they aren't too happy about going out. Beauty is one thing, most guys don't have the $$ to have a truly beautiful girlfriend. So, having a skinny girlfriend is what they are shooting for. If there's anything I get a laugh out of it's seeing a guy out with a beautiful thin girl, but being miserable because she's obviously a real bitch. Why do they do this to themselves? The payoff must be there somewhere. It's when they can make the other guys think they are the shit for having a skinny girlfriend.

Hey great point. Kind of reminds me of something Warren Ferrel said a while back in an interview:

Steven: Are there situations in which it's hard to figure out whether the feminist position would support equality or just support women's claims?

Warren: Not too often. I'm almost always able to solve that by one simple test, which is reversing the roles. The only trick there is that you have to know male/female issues well enough to know what a true role reversal is. For example, the equivalent of a woman being treated as a sex object is a man being treated as a success object. So, a man cannot say, "If a women at work touched me on the rear I'd say 'thank you'; why does she say 'sue you'? The equivalent is a woman taking a man's money, as in going to dinner and expecting to be paid for.

M'

G Money

Everyone should strive to look their best and take care of themselves. If a girl lets herself go when married, then it is a fraud. Same with a guy. Guy's don't have to lose their hair with Propecia and Rogaine and hair club.

People that get fat may be lazy and gluttons and have the power to change. They jusat lack motivation or self esteem.

You can usually spot these people before marriage, unstable jobs and the like and the inability to commit and work hard. Maintianing health and weight are hard work. Many Americans are lazy as evidenced by the super sized people you see.

I do not make exuses for laziness or lack of motivation because unlkess you are confined to a wheelchair... oh wait, I haven't seen many fatties in a wheel chair, ok unless you are a paraplegic....

I guess my point is be fat and proud, you are what you do to yourself. I know this is a sore spot with girls but I work out hard because one day I looked in the mirror and didn't like my body. I could have made 1,000s of excuses but instead decided to do something about it, less talk and more action. I still need to work on my belly to get the 6 pack and will not get any entertainment jobs unless I have a ripped tummy.

I would never get married and let myself go as I feel that is a fraud. To marry and then be a glutton and let my hair fall out would be cruel and show genuine laziness on my part.

I've been a bit sarcastic here and my barbed wit has come out a bit...

jeanniebeanz

Couple thoughts...

I think it is unfair to lump all men into a superficial catagory. My weight has fluctuated quite a bit in the 10 years that I have been with my husband. At my heaviest, 199 lbs (can't make myself admit to 200 :)) my knees which are blown out from years of training knot-headed horses, gave way. It was the first time he said anything to me about my weight and we talked about the health concern. He has always told me that he thought I was beautiful even though I know that there were times when I didn't take care of myself. Not that I didn't take the time to do my hair and makeup, and I've always dressed fashionably even at my heaviest (I still love Lane Bryant even tho most of the clothes are too big for me).

For one, when I was my heaviest, I was working a 50 hour a week job, carrying 17 university units with a 3.8 gpa, and running a family. I was stressed to the max and not taking the time to eat right. I caught what I could to eat, usually late at night (11pm or so) after collapsing exhausted on the couch. It was something I grabbed at the drive thru on my way home from class, high fat, Nacho's, Burrittos, etc. He knew that. After I finished school, I went straight into executive level positions and the stress was just unbearable. Same thing, catching meals as I could, bad eating habits, no time for me. He never pestered me about it, and always made me feel special and that he was proud of me for my accomplishments; escaping a cult and surviving, going back to school and getting a degree with honors, and going further in a career in 5 years than some do in a couple decades. Something had to give though and it finally dawned on me that if I was going to live a long life with my family there needed to be changes.

I talked to my husband of my desire to get my health back and presented him with the information on a lifestyle change that I thought would do both of us some good. He agreed to help me and we started just two months ago. We walk daily, have completely changed our eating and cooking habits, and I just started doing Pilates (ouch). I have lost 22 lbs and he has lost 17 lbs. We feel better and it has been a group effort that we can be proud of. I don't know how I would have felt about the issue if he had not been supportive of me during the most stressful times. His attitude toward my weight, and his making sure that I felt loved no matter what is what ultimately made me want to do better in the arena of weight.

Just my two cents here, but your wife may need your support more than your judgement.

J

IronGland

I've been a bit sarcastic here and my barbed wit has come out a bit...

Barbed wit? I think not.

whyamihere

Everyone should strive to look their best and take care of themselves. If a girl lets herself go when married, then it is a fraud. Same with a guy. Guy's don't have to lose their hair with Propecia and Rogaine and hair club.

I am so very sorry you think like that...I do have to say this....

That is the dumbest thing I have EVER heard in my life!

Wrinkles? Getting old? Gray hair? Is that all fraud or is it a fact of life? Ha I know a guy who lost all of his hair after he got married...couldn't help it and tried everything...Is that fraud?

What about getting old?..."Oh dammit honey I got a wrinkle....I lied to you! When we got married I didn't have any now I do..... I am a fraud"...Wow!

"Oh I see a gray hair I guess you can divorce me now...I am a Fraud!"

Yeah we all should be healthy and fit...but some people are not and have tried and tried and somehow people judge and make comments and become more ignorant as time passes and It's not helping them!

Brooke

trevor

I knew two identical twins when I was a Jehovah’s Witnesses . They were quite porky and we called them Tweedledum and Tweedledee. They both decide it was time to marry as 17 is quite old in JW land. They both slimmed down to size ten and attracted two ardent young ‘brothers’. They looked fantastic at the joint wedding. The girls looked good too!

I met them both a year latter and they were both as fat as pigs. ‘What happened to the diet? I asked.

Oh! Now we are married we don’t have to bother!’

Fortunately My wife is still the size ten she has been since I met her at the battle of Trafalgar. I have also stayed slim. The secret? We are both smug Southern b******s.

There - Saved you women wondering what to call me!

love2Bworldly

Funny but I kind of have the opposite problem of what is being talked about here. Whenever I take walks, my husband (who is diabetic and has gained some weight) refuses to walk with me and sometimes pouts as if he is jealous that I am taking some initiative with my health. Sometimes it's very discouraging as I need to shed at least 45 pounds.

Wife's weight problem

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