Faraon

Joined

• started 27 topics
• posted 818 times   see topics posted on
• send a message

Posts by Faraon

• 
  7

  God on Trial - #3 - Standard of Justice

  by Amazing in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  eating fruit: when eve and then adam ate the fruit, they were given the death penalty and low productivity yield from their food growing efforts.

  but, they did get a nice long life, somewhere around 900-930 years.. murder: cain murdered his own brother, abel.

  cain whines to jehovah about how severe his punishment is, too great to bear, and jehovah consents to put a mark on him so that no one will harm cain.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Faraon

  Satan misleads Eve > God punishes all snakes but not Satan.

  Adam sins > He sentences all his descendants to death.

  Cain kills his brother > Punished by wandering, getting married and building a city. (I think he wandered inside the city)

  Angels rape women and have offspring with them > Most humans are sentenced to death by drowning. Also most animals, but no death sentence to spirits (children of god).

  Noah is seen naked by Cam > Canaan, Cam’s, son is punished for the deeds of his father and his descendents are to forever be slaves of the descendents of the other two brothers.

  Abraham twice pimps wife/sister > He is blessed by god “visiting” her and getting her pregnant.

  Abraham worships god > god orders him to kill his sister’s son.

  Lot is brave enough to offer his daughters to sodomites instead of himself, gets drunk, fucks daughters > Lot gets called “righteous” by the inspired word of god.

  God hardens pharaoh’s heart so he will not free Israelites > God sends 10 plagues to all Egyptians, kills all first born of ALL Egyptians because pharaoh did not let Israelites go.

  JRP
  
• 
  29

  Best urban legends, you heard in the org?

  by Nicolas in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  personnally, i heard a lot of urban legends about the presence of a devil in a house.

  it was always the same kind of story about a devil who lived in a house and then the jw arrive and they pray jehovah and suddendly, the demon go away...

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Faraon

  My brother Cesar’s stories,
  He begins to have nightmares for a month. He cannot sleep. Prays to the Jewish war god and discovers a newspaper under his bed. Tries to burn it but all burns except the horoscopes. He has to add kerosene in order to burn them.
  Working as a traveling salesman, he goes to a hotel. Feels attacked. Looks under the bed and sure enough, some kid had left a smurf under the bed.
  While a MS, he is conducting a Watchtower, aka “bible”, study. The girl shows to be possessed: foaming of the mouth, green vomit, 360 degree head turn. You know, the effects seen on “The Exorcist”. The PO and he go to the attic looking for things that might cause this, and sure enough when they come across this beautiful old dress, the girl starts screaming from downstairs: not that one. They burn it with kerosene and pray to the Jewish god. Case solved.
  This one from my wife:
  A JW missionary couple in a small town in Mexico are surrounded by a mob led by a Catholic Priest. They start discussing the bible but as you know the priest doesn’t know anything about the bible so he becomes enraged and starts kicking the obviously pregnant missioner in the belly. The priest is kicked out of town, and the whole town accepts the Watchtower Bible and Tract Publishing Corp.

  JRP
  
• 
  3

  WT Defends House to House Preaching

  by stevieb1 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am quite eager for anyone to critique the following statement which is perhaps the most scholarly defence of the house-to-house method the society has put out in recent years.. *** w91 1/15 11-12 teach publicly and from house to house ***.

  the apostolic method.

  3 jesus christ gave his followers this meaningful commission: "go therefore and make disciples of people of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the father and of the son and of the holy spirit, teaching them to observe all the things i have commanded you.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Faraon

  3 Jesus Christ gave his followers this meaningful commission: "Go therefore and make disciples of people of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the holy spirit, teaching them to observe all the things I have commanded you. And, look! I am with you all the days until the conclusion of the system of things."

  Acts 11: 1-3 1 The apostles and the brothers throughout Judea heard that the Gentiles also had received the word of God. 2 So when Peter went up to Jerusalem, the circumcised believers criticized him 3 and said, "You went into the house of uncircumcised men and ate with them."

  Why is it that if Jesus commanded his disciples to “make disciples of people of all the nations” did the other Jews give Peter such a hassle for eating with someone from the nations?

  JRP
  
• 
  14

  JW Jokes, If easily offended DO NOT OPEN THREAD!!

  by Brutus in

  1. social
  2. humour

  what do you get if you cross a jehovah's witness with an agnostic?

  someone who calls at your door, but doesn't really know why.

  feel free to add others!

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Faraon

  What do you get if you cross an agnostic, a dislexic, an insomniac, and a JW?
  Someone who spends his/her nights reading Watchtowers to investigate if there is a dog

  JRP
  
• 
  14

  JW Jokes, If easily offended DO NOT OPEN THREAD!!

  by Brutus in

  1. social
  2. humour

  what do you get if you cross a jehovah's witness with an agnostic?

  someone who calls at your door, but doesn't really know why.

  feel free to add others!

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Faraon

  How many JWs are needed to change a lightbulb?

  Only one, but bulb must be changed very frequently due to constant dimming and on/off changes of light.

  JRP
  
• 
  21

  how do i shut a j.w up?

  by h2o in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know many j.w's and they are allways hassling me with there beliefs and making me feel pretty hacked off at times,is there anything i could say to shut them up or any good questions that they don't like being asked,i assume there are a few ex j.w's on this forum so you must have come across some tricky questions before,hope someone can give some advice?thanks

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Faraon

  1. Open your door.
  2. Look menacely at him/her, 0.357 in hand.
  3. Holster your gun.
  4. Say inocently: Sorry, I thought you were a JW.

  If you really want to help them, ask them to first read a copy of Steven Hassan's "Combatting Cult Mind Control" to be discussed before getting into religion.

  JRP
  
• 
  7

  I pledge my ... to the JW Organization?

  by bjc2012 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  the oct. 1, 2001 watchtower magazine, pg.

  22 par.

  "loyalty to god also includes loyalty to his organization...".

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Faraon

  I pledge allegiance to the Watchtower of the United States of America
  One publishing company over god. Without liberty or Justice for all.

  JRP
  
• 
  65

  What are the most stupid JW rule?

  by beroea in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  what are the most stupid jw rule?.

  what do you consider to be the most stupid rules or tradition of the jw lives?

  im thinking about any kind of rule or regulative that only has one answer to the questions why:.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Faraon

  Sex rules. Specially between married people. People marry in order to legally have sex. They try to even control your life in your own bedroom.

  JRP
  
• 
  4

  The Culture of Cults

  by Commie Chris in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i dont know if i have mentioned it in any previous posts, but i am a metis.

  metis are people of mixed indian and non-indian descent.

  we form a distinct national / cultural group in canada, with our own history, or own identity and culture, and our own political movements.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Faraon

  Commie:
  I, on the contrary, think that it is the minorities who have been taken advantage of. Take a look at any assemblies in the US. In Chicago there are two assembies with at least 20,000 (10,000 each) sheep in attendance. I think the growth in here has been mostly in Spanish-speaking congregations.

  JRP
  
• 
  28

  This Article from the Sep KM is very interesting

  by chester in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i thought this article from the september 2001 kingdom ministry was very interesting.. get out there and sell those books!!!.

  is it an obstacle to preaching?.

  most people lead busy lives.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Faraon

  Cygnus,
  

  Seems to me that this article has much scriptural support. Perhaps you people have a larger problem with the Bible's counsel than with the Watchtower itself

  
  Do you have a daughter?
  I would like to buy her. I have scriptural support for this. Of course she is only worth half as much as any of your sons. I have scriptural support for this too.

  JRP