I think this camel's back is broken (the final straw) (page 2)

Finally-Free

Sometimes people need a freakin reality check and wake-up call!!!

I agree. Sometimes those who need it the most are the last to recognize it.

JimmyPage, I feel for you. I can't give advice though, because my leaving the JWs effectively ended my marriage. I was too pushy with the anti-jw info.

W

Awakened at Gilead

I am all for DAing, so if you go that route, Kudos and strength to you, man... and your wife may wake up after all, anyway...

Here's a loophole if you want (remember the child molestors take advantage of this)

If she confesses and you say that it is not true, then they do not have 2 witnesses. They can form a committee for your wife, but unless you corroborate what she says, thay cannot for a JC for you, as they do not have 2 witnesses.

I sat on a JC a few years ago in a similar situation. One person confessed to wrongdoing and implicated another. The other denied it, and avoided a JC. The confessing bro. got a private reproof. While his self-damning testimony was compelling, it was not 2 witnesses against the other, who got off scot-free..

A@G

cameo-d

I'm with Wing Commander.

If Page doesn't get some backbone and set a precedence everybody will walk all over him.

Already the elders see PW all over his face because his wife went behind his back and set him up. If she had called for counseling for herself, that's one thing. But she dragged Page into this against his will. She's wearing the pants. She has betrayed him and gone tattling to Momma.

And the stuff she wants to talk about! Normal people don't even discuss their private lives...esp. sex ...with their own parents, much less run to the org to willingly air their "dirty laundry" to strangers who will take notes, write it all down, and send three copies out to different divisions. All that without any guarantee of confidentiality. It's none of their effin business, Page! There are just some things that should be private to a couple.

Your wife has blatantly disrespected you.

She should have spent time talking it out with you, or maybe some time alone to think. But no. What does she do? Within hours of your disclosure, she runs off to blab to her girlfriend and get her opinion on it. Hell yeah, she's lying to you. Under the cover of "theocratic warfare". The gf gave her advise to 'report you immediately' and she followed through without even a further discussion with you. She thinks more of her gf than she does of you, cos that's who she pays attention to.

What kind of marriage do you have when there is no loyalty? no special secrets? when you give strangers the authority to meddle in your affairs and make judgements on how you choose to live your life? Why do you give power to them? Why do you allow your wife to throw you in the fire and just say "it's ok"?

A marriage is two people. A three-fold cord is an effin noose. Concerning marriage, the scriptures say 'let no man put asunder'....let no one come between you. Not a damn organization and not some sinless carpet cleaner. NO one.

Did WC say bi****. Yeah, I think that's appropriate.

OUTLAW

JimmyPage..Your wife turned you in.....Not much loyalty there I`m afraid.....When you start dealing friends,the dealing never ends....................There is one very big possibility you may not have considered..She may get off,for turning you both in.....You may be the only one D/F or D/A.....I`ve seen it happen before.....She will remain a JW in good standing..And..You will become the enemy of the WBT$....We already know who`s side she`s on..

Clint Eastwood ...OUTLAW

leavingwt

Jimmy:

Hang in there. Draw close to your non-JW friends and family.

-LWT

only me

Hey Jimmy Page- I'm going through much the same thing

maybe we should introduce your wife to my husband

WuzLovesDubs

Since your wife has decided for BOTH of you to go to the elders with a private matter without your consent, thus putting your life in front of the elders, without your consent, thus putting you in an untenable position, without your consent... let her go to them without you. Let HER sit there in front of three MEN and lay bare her guilty soul about your premarital sexual relations if thats what she thinks she needs to do to have a clear conscience or whatever her motive is for doing this. She decides FOR you to throw you both under the bus. And obviously has told OTHER people and not YOU she was going to do this. Since she approached them alone...she can go sit in the hot seat alone.

But as for you...its time to take your life, your heart, your conscience into your own hands and out of the hands of the cult leaders to whom you owe NO allegiance. Fuck their judicial committee!

Write your DA letter, and when the elders come over, hand them the envelope, grab your coat and tell them it's been a slice and you will return home after they have left it. And say to your wife... "Oh and honey? Dont forget to tell them about the blow job you gave me in the coat room of the Kingdom Hall."

Quirky1

JP, I wouldn't DA or play by their rules but I would state to the wifey that you are the head and you will make those kind of calls. I would also relate this info to the PO and BOE for future reference. I would call off the whole meeting thing until "further notice".

Bubblie

JP I am torn between doing a da letter (since this is showing you recognize the control they have over you) or calling the po and telling him she called the meeting without talking to you. I think I lean towards the da letter more. Whatever, you are in a real pickle on this one. When the elders came to visit my ex, I asked as his wife if I could sit in on it. It really opened my eyes to the two against one trick, as they ganged up on him. Not a good feeling to watch this happen to the one I loved. It was shortly after this I left the wt. I am out with no possible return. But the marriage broke up a few years after. Sometimes, some things don't always fix themselves. I wish you the best. Your words needed to be said to her, stay strong and determined. Just get out of the wt.

Kit

I think this camel's back is broken (the final straw)

tooktheredpill