Just be safe!
Let's really talk about sex now- Advice please???
by KateWild 86 Replies latest members adult
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FlyingHighNow
Is there no such thing as no strings, is there always emotions too??? What do you think?
You will have physical and emotional strings to every lover, no matter how trivial it seems at the time, especially if you don't insist on safe sex. I'm not one who thinks that you have to be married to have a physically intimate relationship. I am one who believes casual sex is more enjoyable for men than it is for women, though there are exceptions. I just read a study that came to the conclusion that women are much less likely to have climaxes during casual encounters than men. They talked to both men and women. Men admitted that they are often less interested in pleasing women during casual encounters, than they are when they truly care about their partners. Women admitted to not being able to relax enough to enjoy their encounters. If alcohol was a factor, they were even less likely to be satisfied. It's just food for thought.
If you didn't date very much before you married, you might not understand that a horny guy will say almost anything to try to break your resolve to be choosy. I don't mean just teenagers or twenty somethings. I'm in my 50s and I still get lines from men who are also in their 50s. Makes me think of this song (It sounds great if you haven't heard it. One of the best from 1970:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=siMFORx8uO8
Allright Now by Free
There she stood in the street, smiling from her head to her feet
I said, "A-hey, what is this?"
Now baby maybe, maybe she's in need of a kiss
I said, "A-hey, what's your name, baby?
Maybe we can see things the same
Now don't you wait or hesitate
Let's move before they raise the parking rate"
All right now baby, it's all right now
All right now baby, it's all right now
Let me tell you now
I took her home to my place, watching every move on her face
She said, "Look, what's your game, baby?
Are you tryin' to put me in shame?"
I said, "Slow, don't go so fast
Don't you think that love can last?"
She said, "Love, lord above, now you're gonna trick me in love"
All right now baby, it's all right now
All right now baby, it's all right now
Yeah, it's alright now
Let me tell you all about it now
Took her home to my place, watching every move on her face
She said, "Look, what's your game?
Are you tryin' to put me in shame?"
"Baby", I said, "Slow, slow, don't go so fast
Don't you think that love can last?"
She said, "Love, lord above, now you're gonna trick me in love"
All right now baby, it's all right now
All right now baby, it's all right now
All right now baby, it's all right now (Baby)
All right now baby, it's all right now (Baby, baby, baby, it's all right)
All right now baby (All right now), it's all right now (It's all right, it's all right, it's all right)
All right now baby, it's all right now
All right now baby (We're so happy together), it's all right now (It's all right, it's all right, it's all right, everything is all right)
All right now baby, it's all right now -
FlyingHighNow
Wait for the one that brings out natural trust and pure laughter you had as a little girl ..
Don't trust a guy asking for a casual encounter, no matter how swell he sounds.
There is a difference in dating someone and the casual encounter, though.
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sd-7
But I think many can have fun with others and take care of their needs in a no strings environment, do you disagree???
Is there no such thing as no strings, is there always emotions too??? What do you think?
It's probably different for each person. If you don't feel particularly guilty about a decision of that sort, maybe it might be fine for you. I think I'm probably way more sensitive than most other people, and have had very little experience with women, so...I probably offer an odd perspective on things. I mean, I guess I should say I've only dated two women, not even for very long, maybe less than a year if you put both relationships together, and then married one of them.
I can't see how there could be a 'no strings' interaction. To me, that's the stuff of a romance novel or a naughty daydream, at most, but...real life? I'd be bothered by that sort of thing. I'd rather be in a relationship with the person and let that develop and reach a point where that's something we could talk about and agree or disagree on. The idea of just...that's it? I never understood it.
In fact, why am I even offering advice here? I can only tell you what not to do. Which is pretty much everything I did.
--sd-7
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Quarterback
Well...I've seen your photo on a previus post, and I don't think you'll have any problems receiving offers. Take it slow, and carefully think things through. Evaluate some priorities in your life. Think longterm.
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Quarterback
Well...I've seen your photo on a previus post, and I don't think you'll have any problems receiving offers. Take it slow, and carefully think things through. Evaluate some priorities in your life. Think longterm.
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frankiespeakin
Kate,
If you got an itch then scratch it, and don't worry if it is right or wrong, and don't try to understand, let the Devil take tomorrow, for tonight you need a friend:
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yadda yadda 2
Terry, you write some very wise things but that post was special. And I agree with everything FlyingHighNow says too, also very wise advice.
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FlyingHighNow
Well...I've seen your photo on a previus post, and I don't think you'll have any problems receiving offers.
This here is tricky, tricky. I've had men chase me at various times of my life. Then when I turned them down, watch them turn on a dime and go after women who were not attractive at all. One time the woman looked quite manish. That taught me something important. If a man's libido is going wild, he will of course try persuading an attractive woman, if there is one available. Usually though, attractive women aren't so desperate, so they will turn the guy down. Then he goes for someone unattractive, hoping she will be grateful and desperate. Then the attractive girl realizes it was no compliment that the guy made a pass at her. The unattractive woman knows the guy is full of it. She's not kidding herself.
I knew one woman who had been so hurt by men, that she decided she was just going to be wild and she was going to make the conquests. She got it of her system, but she ended up breaking more than one guy's hearts. I guess if you just want sex and no relationship, you've got to find someone of the quality you want, who wants no string encounters. Hold out for quality though. Something that may be harder to come by than you think it will be.