Not to say this is a permanent condition. But I would not say you are ready just yet. Hubby was a late bloomer. His immaturity wrecked his first marriage. He caught on.
Dating
by d 82 Replies latest social relationships
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Band on the Run
Do you want to date or circle your wagons and murder women? I hear a lot of JW speak concerning dating. We were taught to view each other with suspicion. Some knights came into my life. Women can sense a woman hater. I refuse to be in the same room with them. There are no guarantees. The percentages are good, though.
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d
i want to date but feel that it would be too much of a burden for me and it would distract me.
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FlyingHighNow
Sorry for the typo's what I meant to say is that dating is one way to get yourself into emontional chains.
This is true. That's why dating people you know is safer than seeking out people you don't know.
When you're not a kid anymore, you realize there is nothing simple about dating. Unless I know I would enjoy a couple of hours of someone's company, I'm not going to date the person. It's also good to find people who are truly after what you're after in dating. Do you not want a serious, long term relationship or marriage? Do you hope for it to be just light, enjoyable company? Do you just want to date with sex as the main goal?
I'm a person who thinks you cannot make Miss or Mr Right happen. You can't force a natural, good relationship with the wrong person. You will either click or you won't.
One problem I have found with men in my age group is that most of the single ones are divorced or widowed recently. Unlike young men who want to play the field, these guys can't stand the void in their lives and they want to replace the misses-- like yesterday. Some of them want someone to take care of them, mamma style. They also think they are falling in love, almost immediately, when really it's a simple crush on someone they find charming and attractive. They want to be committed, too early. It's pretty burdensome to have 5 people out of 6 think they are in love with you and want to delve into a long term. I'm not against a long term, committed relationship, nor am I against being loved, but it has to be with the right person, under the right circumstances.
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FlyingHighNow
Guys who genuinely like women, they are the best. That's along with BOTR's comment. I don't mean like women for the sex they can provide for you. You know, their breasts, backsides and genitalia and what you can do with them, being the only things you like, or that and being waited on hand and foot. I mean men who genuinely love the feminine gender and all that goes with it. Men who like women tend to be liked by women in return.
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d
I do too I love and respect women but I feel that many would look at me and scream and run the other. I recently asked a girl out and she just walked away.
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FlyingHighNow
We have to accept that just like us, other people have things they are attracted to and things they are repelled by. You may ask someone out and you just not be her type. Then the next person you ask out might find you interesting enough to go out with. I was a cute kid when I was in high school. I hardly got asked out. When I have run into guys I knew back in high school, they say, "Man, I had the biggest crush on you." I'm like, "Why didn't you tell me? I was sitting home on the weekends or out with friends. I would have went out with you." They always reply, "You were so attractive that I was sure you wouldn't take a second look at me." Keep asking, eventually someone will say yes.
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d
I would but my My cult programming gets the better of me. Plus I have never been on a true date before I am only 23 I know how sad.
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transhuman68
d- Think of it as looking for a ‘friend with benefits’- with the emphasis on ‘friend’. You want to find out what a girl likes or dislikes, what her interests are, and what she likes to do on her nights out on the town etc, before you even think about asking her out. That’s why the JW’s are so unsuccessful- you can’t just knock on someone’s door and ask them if they want to live forever in Paradise, lol, it’s much easier if it’s someone you know and like.
And being confident, easy-going and not really caring if she accepts a date or not helps, too- if you’re not, just fake it, lol.
It’s worth it- you will have some good times you will never regret. -
will-be-apostate
Try hookers, just be safe :D but seriously, I have the same issues. It took me two years to get used to the "worldy" (=normal) way of thinkig about relationships and sex. Now when I see a teen couple I no longer despise them.
I think your problem is more connected to your personality, maybe you are used to live and figure things out on your own. You need to socialize more; drinks do help to relax. Get out of your comfort zone.