by jst2laws 112 Replies latest jw friends
well said Steve!!
Unfortunately that is the nature of things. Some here are paranoid about towing the party line and show themselves up to be no different to what they were just a few years back. Fortunately, not all subscribe to the same mentality.
Stacy....I got you a wicked engagement ring.
BigTex Thanks
Notice I have to wait for the cache to clear to give me just one more reply post!!
Its like I have to fight to squeeze all I have to say in without taking breath!!
Take care all
Scoob
I hope the mods and Simon take strong note of Mouthy's initial reaction, even though it seems to be smoothed over. Think about why she had that reaction in the first place.
If you spent any time on the real witness boards that tried to allow for as much discussion as possible, you know that witnesses don't necessarily shy away from arguments or controversy. In fact, I think the genius of Obed at witnet, was that he realized that even with real witnesses moderating and administrating his site, if you let people talk, they will talk themselves out of the "truth". Now "witnet" was heavily moderated, but compared to other witness sites it wasn't. It had to be heavily moderated, to keep out apostates. We have no such thing as apostates here, and this place should never begin stifling discussion to the extent even the most liberal *witness* site did.
I gotta tell you, it's kinda heading that way.
I know that when I first made the jump from a real witness discussion board (witnet) onto an apostate board (h20), it wasn't the cursing or the fighting that I censured myself from, it was atheism. LOL, yep, godless Six would not cotton to them horrible atheist. Of course, as time went on, it became clear that they were having the more interesting discussions, so I would take a peek. The point being, that a curious person will pick and choose what they will or will not read. You think they'll scurry back to the KH if they see an arguement? Hell no they won't. People are people, and people love train wrecks.
The point being, moderate the moderation back a notch or two. The nice thing is that your job will be easier. Get rid of the list of rules, since you won't and can't and shouldn't enforce them evenly. Replace the rules with a statement about your vision for this place, and only use mods that demonstrate that they can effect a similar vision, Simon. I think Seven leads the way, even if just by her absence, lol. It doesn't mean you have to allow unlimited outright meanness and shit-stirring, but even exiting witnesses have VERY strong feelings about free speech, maybe even more so than the rest of the world in general.
And moderaters, for god's sake, recuse yourself from any thread on which you express any opinion whatsoever. You just can't have it both ways. *smacks row of mods heads like a marx brothers movie*
I well know that the situation is complicated at this time, with every move a mod makes being disected by a gallery and some people and animals playing to that gallery. Let them rot in the hell of their own anti-social construct.
I joined this forum, purely by accident.
I had been on exJW forums before, but had stayed clear of them for years.
When my very close and dear friend died of a brain aneurysm only days before New Years 2002/2003, I was a wreck.
We were to spend New Years Eve, hanging out with friends and having a great time .
Then came the on New Years Eve. Robert was found dead in his apartment (I had called him, but he did not answer his phone for 2 days; I assumed he went out of town to visit one of his siblings on a whim) - and I'm not lying, I'm tearing up as I write this.
Oh man....so, there I am. My best friend is dead.
A routine of great days/nights and companionship came abruptly to an end. The day of his funeral, would have been his 38th birthday, which we were going to have a big shindig. But it was his funeral: I hated that day so much, and it snowed like a son-of-a-bitch. I gave a eulogy, and I was able to hold it together.
I walked home. I was lost for what seemed like forever.
That following week, after Robert's funeral, I was so bored, and so down in the dumps. For some odd reason, out of complete boredom, I came here: this site.
Dunno....but good ol' QWERTY and his post, stirred some humour into me, and well, I was inspired to post. Thanks QWERTY and Jourles as well.
I came here, for a few things I suppose.
To get a sense of where I've come in the time frame, post-JW to almost 20 years later. Like a benchmark moment for me.
Since then, I've met some lovely people, and I've had some wonderful times.
I guess in some regard, I have validated a lot of stuff that I had not necessarily dealt with effectively. Coming here, when I did, I guess.....in some ways, showed me and probably others who knew me 'way back', that I had calmed down, toned down, and became a better person.
SanFranciscoJim: oh hell....he saw me at full tilt many years ago.
He knows the Before and After, like no one else. Even me, I can see it, feel it and am glad I've come to this point.
This forum, for what it's worth, gave me some resolve, validation and some peace of mind.
It helped me deal with my dear friend Robert's unexpected death.
For that, I'll be forever grateful.
six has a point, moderate or discuss, not both. If you want to join a spirited discussion, leave your baggage (and your shield) at the door. State that you are a civvy and join in, but don't do both
Steve
I'm sorry, I don't agree that moderators should not take part in discussions.
The point of the moderators is to be there if something needs to be done, not to be 'patrolling the corridors looking for infringements'. They are volunteers who often do a thankless task. We are not just here to push the buttons for everyone else to enjoy the site !
The reason the moderators were chosen is that they have a track record of being fairly balanced, level headed posters who frequently can smooth things over in a civilised manner.
I haven't seen people using their moderator permissions to win an argument, that would be wrong, but if discussions develop into an argument or start containing insults then they can do something about it which is why they are there.
As for politics? Sheesh, Stacy - I think you have a cheek to be honest. I've been saying ad-nauseum that people can discuss politics as long as they keep it civil. Don't complain about politics being allowed if you can't do this and I have as much right to take part in any discussion or to express my opinions as anyone else does.
I said "spirited" discussions. If they have a firm point of view, and they are discussing a topic, then I think they should stand aside as a mod ON THAT TOPIC only. That leaves plenty of other mods to keep the peace. Stopping some discussion mid flight could be seen as wrong if you were taking part in that discussion.
But I've stopped following the thread properly, it isn't a mod thread, it's a persons opinion of the purpose of this site. I've said my bit, and a few have responded. I have no arguement, just opinion.
Steve
People's roles change after they have been on ex-JW sites for a while.
When I first went on line I came across incredibly useful information by Norman Hovland. I scoured the net looking for anything that he had written until I eventually stumbled across the old-style Watchtower Observer which back then was a hugely massive site. At that time I was mainly a taker on ex-witness boards.
As time went on, I realised that I might be an asset in some of my experiences. This was chiefly to do with forming an enjoyable social life outside of JW's as I felt that I had learned a fair bit having been an outie for so many years, so then I enjoyed re-dressing the balance and acting sometimes as a giver, instead of always being a taker.
I was always concerned that JWD would eventually have so many angry ex's expressing themselves that eventually it would actually become the cause of it's own destruction. My fear was that newbie ex's would find the board so abhorrently anti-JW, anti-Christian and anti any control whatsoever, that no new people would want to stay here. For that reason I have always believed that moderation (with the lightest possible touch) was essential.
Despite all the ups and down that we go through here, I still maintain that the vast majority of people who frequent this forum are helpful and kindly folk. Like I said a while ago, I haven't yet met a poster I didn't like.
Englishman.
In the short time i have accessed the internet,looked on sites,I have found some to be helpful others not,control is there,i suppose a measure of control is necessary,however for some this may be the only place they have to talk,I came out of JWS without the help of the Internet,did not have computer,many others did too.
One has to be discerning,help is available,some people need to talk about very personal things,counselling would be necessary,someone who would be unshockable.I do not know how it works yet on this site.I have gone through my trials and have received help.So I know the journey out is very difficult for some....fran
Well said Steve. Great mission statement!
This post reminds me of the movie line in 'Cool Hand Luke' "What we have hear is a lack of communication."
Guest 77
