OK NOW BEE! Listen UP!!!! I just HAVE to post this before I finish reading the rest of the comments because I'm so anxious to tell you to NOTTTTTT go back to the K. Hall with your ex. Don't misunderstand me... have a relationship with him if you love each other, but DO NOT let him drag you into the JW's. You need to hear my story: I am still technically a JW but haven't been to a meeting in months and months and months (a year? wow, maybe...) anyhow... I have been seriously involved with my boyfriend for about 2 years now (still keeping it hidden from my JW family 'cos I don't want the grief... yeah, I know, I'm a wimp) BUT... and here's the clincher-- up until about a year ago, I was trying at EVERY TURN to get my bfriend to study... to a meeting, etc. I tried EVERY line of sneaky reasoning I could... but to no avail (thank God for that now...). What was it that made me WAKE UP and see the "light"? HIS ACTIONS (they DO speak louder than words, ya know!) : ) He is a very spiritual person (tho' not religious). He always refuted my scriptural (cough, cough) arguments about how true the "Truth" was with common sense and love. He basically believes that everyone can have a one-on-one relationship with the creator, and if there is a judgement day down the road, each individual will be judged according to how they've lived their lives and how they've loved others. Period. He actually LIVES this!!! After a while, his love and kindness towards everyone totally overshadowed what ANY witness personality or action. It took a looooonnnnngggg time, believe me, but I'm so glad he didn't "cave" and start into the JW lifestyle just for me. So... what's my point? Well, I'm living proof that time and patience and LOVE can work if you put yourself into it. Never give up but DO NOT let him even think for a SECOND that you'll convert into the JW's. That's just prolonging misery, in my opinion. You will find out soon enuf if he REALLY loves you. If he gives up on YOU, then you know he's not the one. So please try to live your life, especially when it comes to conversations and time spent with him, the best you possibly can. Focus on YOUR spirituality (everyone has some of it, ya know) and make him see that THIS is how to truly live. Hope this helps and doesn't hinder! : ) Best of luck to you!
Posts by JBean
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34I'm screwed..........
by butalbee ini went w/ my ex to the hall tonight, don't remember much except walking in, hiding in the bathroom for half hour, and dodging all the schmoozing when trying to exit the building.
i also remember my ex holding my hand and smiling at me.
it was a happy smile, like "i am so glad you're here w/ me", but it hinted of evil intentions.
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76
Shunning is the big story
by joelbear ini just read the story about the family in oregon, gone forever, because of the pressure of shunning.. in my opinion, shunning is the big story about jehovah's witnesses.
shunning and the fear of shunning is what enables the control of victims of child abuse.
shunning is what destroys families.
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JBean
Interesting thread... I've really enjoyed Mav's comments here. Note to Discuss: I think DFing only teaches folks to be more careful not to get caught the next go-round! Seriously... if someone is going to commit adultury or fornicate, they're NOT going to stop for any length of time just because of DFing. As LDH said, they won't do it out of love and commitment... not because they'll get punished. People get reinstated all the time and yet they really haven't "learned" anything.
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65
Meet my Lil Man:)
by mommy inhey all.
i just got home from the hospital earlier this evening, but i wanted to post a few pics of my lil man for you.
i can't believe he is finally here!
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JBean
Those pics brought tears to my eyes! Congratulations to you and your family! Rest up now! : )
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7
entering phase 2...
by jeffory inthe last 3 year's have been like a rollercoaster ,,,the bubble that is life as a true believer has been burst, after nearly 20 years as an elder i declined to accept the position after my wife and i moved from the cong.
we had been with in seattle to another hall.. the consequences of rejecting a position further strengthened my view that life in the backassward world of jwdom is not an option anymore.
dec.4th 2001 was our last meeting, i had just had enough, haven't been back and won't go back.. these board's have been a real therapuetic event.the good,the bad and the ugly all post here.
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JBean
Best wishes in your new "adventure"! Drop by when you can and let us know how it's all going! Congrats!!!
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42
I'm in agony
by rem inmy wife just left me this morning.
i've been crying all night.
i am so drained.
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JBean
Just caught this thread now... I can't really add too much to what all the others have said. My heart aches for what you're going through right now. But each day brings new hope and promise. Things WILL get better for you, whichever way they end up... take care of yourself. Jbean
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27
Don't read if you're under 30......:)
by Tatiana inhi guys.
been gone a few days and i'm glad to be back.
i missed you all.
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JBean
I agree! I'm just 40 and I BARELY remember many of these... some I did get though and I'm very proud of myself! : )
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8
Eating right for your blood type.
by D wiltshire inover the last 7 weeks i've been trying to follow macrobiotic and eating right accourding to my blood type.. the results have been really good and i highly recomend it.. my cholesteral has gone from 290 to 184 and my wieght has dropped from 200 to 172 and i eat regularly and perhaps a little more than most people.. i will provide more info latter if i get inquiries.. .
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join the watchtower or you will die.. only jehovah's witnesses have the truth all other religions evil and from the devil.. you must beleive the watchtower or you're going to die a painful death forever, isn't that really good news?.
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JBean
I am very interested in this eating plan. Please do post more! I've been doing lots of oat brand stuff to get my cholesterol down. I'm awaiting my latest test results. But every little bit helps, right?
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5
still feeling the guilt.
by sleepy instill feeling the guilt.. why?.
i havent done enought.. but i feel my hands are tied.. i could write to friends, call them go to the hall and make a speech,or go to assembly grounds, hand out leaflets.. but if i do any of that i will be disfellowshipped.. then no one will talk to me even my family will have problems.. but if i don't do something now what good is my current standing with the witnesses, whats the point in being able to talk to them if i don't use it to any effect?.
do i just sod it all ,write a load of letters , even go to the hall i put my hand up and say what i really think?.
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JBean
Sleepy... you are not alone. There are plenty of us here (lurkers too, I'm sure) that still feel as you do. I've been asking myself the "what do I do" question for many months now. The answer I've given myself is... "take my time, take care of myself emotionally and physically, and with lots of prayer, God will help me find my way." Hope this helps a bit... Jbean (PS: It stinks, doesn't it, that you're a MS, haven't been seen for a while, and no one gives you a call?!)
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42
Intro & Urgent Request
by doinmypart ini have been lurking on this & other boards for a couple of years.
i am an elder in the u.s. we had an elder's meeting last week where we read a 7 page boe letter.
i have a copy in pdf format and would like to post it here.
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JBean
Thanks Doinmypart! Looking forward to more of your posts!
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51
Pet Peeves
by patio34 inanyone have any pet peeves they'd like to air?
here's one that just happened at work that is an annoyance for me: when you are speaking and the person interrupts the conversation with a corny play on words or the like.
for example, "i had to sit on the phone on hold for about 5 minutes, waiting .
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JBean
People who leave an empty coffee pot at work ON the burner... nice fire hazard. Shut it off or make another pot, dimwit!!! : )