I can relate to your thread, married, kids, WT lies, anger, etc.
I read yknot's comments and I have to agree with her/him (sorry yknot I am not on here enough to figure that your gender)
For me and my husband, he was never the spiritual head (according to WT rules) but I could not ask for a better husband and father. When I slowly dripped the information to him exposing the WT he did nothing, he could care less one way or the other.
This made me SO ANGRY! I was angry at the simple fact that he had this built in switch to turn on and off the WT bullsh$t and I didn't!!!
It took me about a year of anger to figure this all out but once it came into my level of awareness I created my own "switch"
Take the good leave the bad, if you take away the fear, guilt and shame your left with your little 5 yr old leaning next to you during the meeting asking how many pages is your bible? Mine has XXXX. or "Help me find the scripture"this is the good stuff. The bad stuff is actually repeating the crap about not going to college, or this is bad, that is bad, those people are bad because they are not witnesses. My husbands spiritual role is completely fulfilled simply driving us to the meetings....that's it!
When your kids get in school and make friends and they come over for a sleepover, you can see the difference in manners and speech with some of them. I do let worldly kids stay over and some you can't tell the difference from witness kids but there are some that will NEVER come back.
When your kids are ready to graduate high school, if your in the good graces your child will rake in the presents and money from the cong. party.
My point is get yourself to a level where you can mend the relationships with the most precious people in your life, Shut out all the NOISE and go inside yourself and meditate on what you want your family to look like 5 , 10, 15, 20 years from now. Hold those visions daily and don't worry about how you will get there remember WHY you want to get there.
Remember that ignorance is bliss and when you go to the hall it is just a bunch ignorant people, the real truth is NOT in their level of awareness YET, this is what you have to deal with.
I make it a game and throw simple comments right back people to catch them off guard to "Think" What I say would never be construed as an apostate comment, I am usually making a comment of something said at an assembly.
Just last week a die hard friend said her son was really sick maybe mono (he got a full scholarship to college but MUST reg. pioneer so the parents can keep status quo) and I said to her "A light bulb just went off, this is why they did the demonstration at the CA about higher education and it being Satan's snare" My comment gave her a puzzled look, like what does that have to do with mono, it will get her thinking that the full time school and full time pony dance put too much stress on him and his immune system weakened.
I have rattled on to much but peace for you is waiting.
